tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7754684819908801536.post1104427077906584449..comments2024-03-15T22:00:36.095-07:00Comments on Dr. Kathy McCoy: Living Fully in Midlife and Beyond: The Honeymoon Is Over -- Thank Goodness!Dr. Kathy McCoyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02903015507894951725noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7754684819908801536.post-67325415686877837792011-09-28T18:51:56.407-07:002011-09-28T18:51:56.407-07:00Sounds like you're doing great, Jeanie! Being ...Sounds like you're doing great, Jeanie! Being comfortable with silence is no small thing.Dr. Kathy McCoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02903015507894951725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7754684819908801536.post-12674662884530327052011-09-28T18:49:44.592-07:002011-09-28T18:49:44.592-07:00This is a fascinating post for me -- Rick and I ha...This is a fascinating post for me -- Rick and I have never done the marriage/honeymoon thing, despite 16 years of being together. So, I never thought of that potential awkwardness. With us, the silences are comfortable, needed. And yes there is plenty of talk, too. But we've learned our flow. Now if we could just learn to live in the same space!Jeaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17482528482559445943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7754684819908801536.post-53753166774052304162011-09-27T15:05:50.124-07:002011-09-27T15:05:50.124-07:00Thanks so much for your insightful comments, Betty...Thanks so much for your insightful comments, Betty, Jo, Linda, Jann, Sextant, Patti and Nance! You're right that the expectations of honeymoons tend to be over the top and more emphasis on the wedding than on the relationship. Maybe the recession will be a help in toning down some of the excesses. Bob and I had a 70's style park wedding and spent less than $300 on everything including the catered picnic lunch. A close friend's daughter just got married a week and a half ago in a very unique ceremony in an urban music studio and the bride and groom made many of the decorations. I doubt that it was terribly expensive, but it was very expressive of the people they are -- and, as such, was very much enjoyed by their loved ones! And Sextant, I think you're right about some young people not being used to being alone together as a couple. Jo, so sorry about your daughter and her husband. When I was doing couples counseling, it made me so sad to see young couples giving up so readily when faced with life's happenings. Linda, I'm glad you got a chance at a fun second honeymoon. And Patti, I readily admit to annoying qualities, though Bob and I don't always agree on what those are!Dr. Kathy McCoyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02903015507894951725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7754684819908801536.post-39233950711120154592011-09-27T14:37:13.323-07:002011-09-27T14:37:13.323-07:00My Bahamas honeymoon was a resounding flop. I was ...My Bahamas honeymoon was a resounding flop. I was struck by a self-consciousness--not with my husband, but with the whole wide world--that froze me in place. It was a kind of stage fright that I never would have anticipated: "Ta-da! The happy couple wake up to the next day of the rest of their lives!" <br /><br />I'd always managed to duck such dramatic moments in the past (skipped my graduation ceremonies, for example), but this one had sneaked up on me and I was unprepared. I'm lousy at smiling on demand for a camera, too.<br /><br />These days, not only honeymoons, but weddings lead to fevered expectations and almost inevitable disappointments. Somebody, let these poor kids off the hook. If there is one small blessing in a massive recession, it's an end to the Fairytale Wedding brought to you by the Wedding Channel. I hope.Nancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15166865250789996825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7754684819908801536.post-74222870541747682622011-09-27T07:03:27.485-07:002011-09-27T07:03:27.485-07:00I think honeymoons and New Years Eve celebrations ...I think honeymoons and New Years Eve celebrations seldom live up to the expectation of being the greatest time ever. Too much pressure. <br />Had to laugh at Bob's comment about annoying traits. I'd have had to have said," Annoying traits?? Surely you don't mean me. I have none.":))<br />Arkansas PattiAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7754684819908801536.post-70714239191665568052011-09-27T05:17:59.041-07:002011-09-27T05:17:59.041-07:00Observing my son, his wife, and their friends, I w...Observing my son, his wife, and their friends, I wonder if some of the problem was that these younger couples were stuck by themselves thousands of miles away from a crowd of their friends about to keep them entertained. I am not sure that my observation is across the board for this generation, but my son and his friends seem incapable of doing anything a mere couples. There always seems to be a crowd of friends with them.Sextanthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02869179401767968180noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7754684819908801536.post-70653037343164771872011-09-26T21:32:42.612-07:002011-09-26T21:32:42.612-07:00Remembering 40 years ago...it wasn't the honey...Remembering 40 years ago...it wasn't the honeymoon that was awkward, but the day to day living that required some adjustment. I'm envious that you are basking in warm tropical breezes.<br />JannAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7754684819908801536.post-17851227369196191312011-09-26T20:38:49.908-07:002011-09-26T20:38:49.908-07:00I remember the awkward honeymoon. It wasn't o...I remember the awkward honeymoon. It wasn't on Maui. We both got food poisoning in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania. Still. The second honeymoon was more fun. We left all our kids at home and flew to Boston for a week.Linda Myershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05706455533282204519noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7754684819908801536.post-69481411353026945312011-09-26T17:19:00.973-07:002011-09-26T17:19:00.973-07:00What a lovely post.
My daughter and her husband a...What a lovely post.<br /><br />My daughter and her husband are in the midst of getting a divorce. The sad thing is, they are perfect for each other, but life got in the way. It's sad how it does that sometimes, isn't it?Johttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03382221688268676914noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7754684819908801536.post-115941893682038222011-09-26T16:04:55.839-07:002011-09-26T16:04:55.839-07:00We didn´t have a honeymoon. A few days off, but th...We didn´t have a honeymoon. A few days off, but then it was back to work. We survived and I like how you formulated it: "Maybe they'll smile, as we do, at memories of less-than-ideal beginnings that have given way to kindness, acceptance and celebration." So very true.Betty Whttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02357132033070346815noreply@blogger.com